Wednesday, March 30, 2016
Life: Fine...
Life: Fine...: Something I learned awhile back: "Fine" stands for: "F" is for frustrated "I" is for insecure "N&quo...
Fine...
Something I learned awhile back:
"Fine" stands for:
"F" is for frustrated
"I" is for insecure
"N" is for neurotic
"E" is for exhausted
So I have learned that I don't answer people with the word "Fine" anymore when they ask me how I am. For the most part people don't really care how you feel so the polite customary way is to tell people you are fine.
After much thought I had heard someone say that when you are a person who lives with multiple health issues and if your feet hit the floor each morning and you thanked God for another day, is to say to people when they great you, that my response now is "I'm giving it a good ole try" and that is exactly what I am doing. Giving each day a good ole try.
Now for me to stay strong and positive is another question. I am just like any other people on this earth, that we all let stress take over our lives. But stress is not healthy for anyone. So what are we supposed to do? We can't always eliminate stress, but we can choose how to handle it. (Okay, I know I am being positive or optimistic) It truly is our choice as to how we handle stress and even our own lives.
I have a strong faith in God, and he gives me direction and hope. So what is the higher power that you truly believe in? Does it give you hope? So being a true Christian it's not always about attending church on Sunday's, it's about being a committed person of faith. I am not saying that I am always committed to my faith and yep, I am human so I do sin (probably most of the time), but I do repent and ask for forgiveness. But I am certainly not "Fine"... I am broken in so many ways.
I always question "why" do I have Gastroparesis, and Bipolar, and a severe digestive system disorder, an autoimmune disease, COPD, Fibromyalgia and so one? I guess because God thinks I am a bad ass and that I can handle it all. And for the most part I do, and yes there are days I don't. So does that make me just "fine"?
Nope, I am not just fine, but I do feel that my purpose since I have been diagnosed with a chronic debilitation terminal illness, is to be a good person, a good friend, a good neighbor, a good listener, a good motivator, and just simply be what I should be and that is giving each day a "good ole try".
So I have learned to smell the flowers, fresh cut grass, look at the sunrises, look at the sunsets, appreciate all that I have and just ride that roller coaster with my health and bipolar. Trust me that roller coaster has been busy here lately. As I am sure many people are the same way. So sit down, buckle up, and just give it a try.
Now I wish I could conjure up a cure for Gastroparesis, Bipolar or any other disorder/disease people have so that we could all live a harmonious life. But I am not God. So why does he allow people (like me and you) suffer physical, mental and emotional pain? I sure wish I knew why. So I have been taking a different look at it. God wants us to be compelled to understand that our physical being is fragile and yep, we do come to an expiration date. It's how we handle our lives as to when that expiration date comes. (mine will be sooner than later - and so many good people have expired sooner than what I have wanted them to)...So I do understand how we all can be numb, upset, angry and eventually accept what we are dealt. I think the cards for me are all stacked the wrong way.
I guess I am scared as to what will happen to me. I have worked all my life from the age of 14 on. I have been a dedicated, reliable employee. Now with my disabilities I am facing a early medical retirement. I think I will still develop a sense of purpose. I will need that purpose to continue to want to live on and fight. And so I have 3 purposes (my kids) and my husband, my step kids, my step grandson, and all of my many friends.
So I kind of thought, I give 2 ladies a ride to work almost every day, (it's on my way and they walk all the time)... I have made 2 new friends and I find that exciting. So what if after my retirement I start up a Uber service. That could give me a purpose still, make a little bit of cash and meet new people.
Are you really just "Fine"...? I know I am not. I am just giving each day a good ole try. Because my feet seem to keep hitting the floor every day after I wake up and so I guess even thru my pain I have to keep going because people rely on me in so many different ways.
So please keep giving your life a "good ole try" and just remember "Fine" is kind of a mind numbing answer to all of the passing question. So mix things up and startle a stranger, worker, friend or whomever with the words, giving it a good ole try.
Keep Smiling
Carla
"Fine" stands for:
"F" is for frustrated
"I" is for insecure
"N" is for neurotic
"E" is for exhausted
So I have learned that I don't answer people with the word "Fine" anymore when they ask me how I am. For the most part people don't really care how you feel so the polite customary way is to tell people you are fine.
After much thought I had heard someone say that when you are a person who lives with multiple health issues and if your feet hit the floor each morning and you thanked God for another day, is to say to people when they great you, that my response now is "I'm giving it a good ole try" and that is exactly what I am doing. Giving each day a good ole try.
Now for me to stay strong and positive is another question. I am just like any other people on this earth, that we all let stress take over our lives. But stress is not healthy for anyone. So what are we supposed to do? We can't always eliminate stress, but we can choose how to handle it. (Okay, I know I am being positive or optimistic) It truly is our choice as to how we handle stress and even our own lives.
I have a strong faith in God, and he gives me direction and hope. So what is the higher power that you truly believe in? Does it give you hope? So being a true Christian it's not always about attending church on Sunday's, it's about being a committed person of faith. I am not saying that I am always committed to my faith and yep, I am human so I do sin (probably most of the time), but I do repent and ask for forgiveness. But I am certainly not "Fine"... I am broken in so many ways.
I always question "why" do I have Gastroparesis, and Bipolar, and a severe digestive system disorder, an autoimmune disease, COPD, Fibromyalgia and so one? I guess because God thinks I am a bad ass and that I can handle it all. And for the most part I do, and yes there are days I don't. So does that make me just "fine"?
Nope, I am not just fine, but I do feel that my purpose since I have been diagnosed with a chronic debilitation terminal illness, is to be a good person, a good friend, a good neighbor, a good listener, a good motivator, and just simply be what I should be and that is giving each day a "good ole try".
So I have learned to smell the flowers, fresh cut grass, look at the sunrises, look at the sunsets, appreciate all that I have and just ride that roller coaster with my health and bipolar. Trust me that roller coaster has been busy here lately. As I am sure many people are the same way. So sit down, buckle up, and just give it a try.
Now I wish I could conjure up a cure for Gastroparesis, Bipolar or any other disorder/disease people have so that we could all live a harmonious life. But I am not God. So why does he allow people (like me and you) suffer physical, mental and emotional pain? I sure wish I knew why. So I have been taking a different look at it. God wants us to be compelled to understand that our physical being is fragile and yep, we do come to an expiration date. It's how we handle our lives as to when that expiration date comes. (mine will be sooner than later - and so many good people have expired sooner than what I have wanted them to)...So I do understand how we all can be numb, upset, angry and eventually accept what we are dealt. I think the cards for me are all stacked the wrong way.
I guess I am scared as to what will happen to me. I have worked all my life from the age of 14 on. I have been a dedicated, reliable employee. Now with my disabilities I am facing a early medical retirement. I think I will still develop a sense of purpose. I will need that purpose to continue to want to live on and fight. And so I have 3 purposes (my kids) and my husband, my step kids, my step grandson, and all of my many friends.
So I kind of thought, I give 2 ladies a ride to work almost every day, (it's on my way and they walk all the time)... I have made 2 new friends and I find that exciting. So what if after my retirement I start up a Uber service. That could give me a purpose still, make a little bit of cash and meet new people.
Are you really just "Fine"...? I know I am not. I am just giving each day a good ole try. Because my feet seem to keep hitting the floor every day after I wake up and so I guess even thru my pain I have to keep going because people rely on me in so many different ways.
So please keep giving your life a "good ole try" and just remember "Fine" is kind of a mind numbing answer to all of the passing question. So mix things up and startle a stranger, worker, friend or whomever with the words, giving it a good ole try.
Keep Smiling
Carla
No wrong turnings...
“There are no wrong turnings. Only paths we had not known we were meant to walk.”
Have you ever caught yourself going down the wrong turn and yet not know how to turn back?
I know I have done this so many different times. And I guess as this quote states there are no wrong turns. These are paths that we didn't know we were meant to walk down. We may not like the walk and we may be scared of what is at this end of the walk, but do we turn around and go back?
But what if you go back and face your past once again? I know I really don't want to face my past and relive it again, as long as I know how my future is all going to turn out (not so pleasant). But what if we could all turn around, go back and correct all of the regrets we have made in our lives? This is something I have been pondering each and every day, simply because my health has really gotten worse from some choices that I made, yep in my past, but if I could go back and make new choices, would my life today be any different?
Just as the "Doc" in "Back to the future" we can't cross paths with our former selves because it would change the time of our future. But let me tell you I really want to go back and make changes because I do really feel like if I could make some different choices in my past life then I wouldn't be sitting here now today with all of these regrets. I will never ever regret my 3 children, they are the absolute
best thing that God ever gave me, was to blessed to be their Momma. I don't know where I'd be without them. So I really don't want to go back so far as to not have my kiddos. I guess I don't really know where I'd want to go back to?
I know God has control of our former, present and future selves (that is if you believe). And I do know that I would not be where I am today without my ultimate faith in God. He is the reason I am still here today. Simply because I lost all sense of my life and I just wanted all of the mental and physical pain to stop and so God saved me from my suicide attempt. So I wonder to myself is this what God saved me for? To live my life in a miserable state and go forward down a different path and no turning back? So of course my human desire is to NOT live such a miserable existence. And trust me there are so many times I really wish God would just take me to heaven. But I know my kids and family would be so hurt and really miss me.
So I guess this path that I am supposed to walk down is way different than the path I would have chosen for myself. I struggle and fight myself constantly and I truly hate this point in my life as it is.
So why as human's do we hate our current state of life if this is truly what God chose for us? Because just that, we are human and that is what we do, fight the current path that we are supposed to walk down. So I guess their are no wrong turns, just a path we didn't know we were supposed to walk down.
Do you have any regrets? Then if so don't look back and take the wrong turn, try to take a path we didn't know we were supposed to follow. Because maybe, just maybe, this path just may be the right turn.
Keep Smiling
Carla
Have you ever caught yourself going down the wrong turn and yet not know how to turn back?
I know I have done this so many different times. And I guess as this quote states there are no wrong turns. These are paths that we didn't know we were meant to walk down. We may not like the walk and we may be scared of what is at this end of the walk, but do we turn around and go back?
But what if you go back and face your past once again? I know I really don't want to face my past and relive it again, as long as I know how my future is all going to turn out (not so pleasant). But what if we could all turn around, go back and correct all of the regrets we have made in our lives? This is something I have been pondering each and every day, simply because my health has really gotten worse from some choices that I made, yep in my past, but if I could go back and make new choices, would my life today be any different?
Just as the "Doc" in "Back to the future" we can't cross paths with our former selves because it would change the time of our future. But let me tell you I really want to go back and make changes because I do really feel like if I could make some different choices in my past life then I wouldn't be sitting here now today with all of these regrets. I will never ever regret my 3 children, they are the absolute
best thing that God ever gave me, was to blessed to be their Momma. I don't know where I'd be without them. So I really don't want to go back so far as to not have my kiddos. I guess I don't really know where I'd want to go back to?
I know God has control of our former, present and future selves (that is if you believe). And I do know that I would not be where I am today without my ultimate faith in God. He is the reason I am still here today. Simply because I lost all sense of my life and I just wanted all of the mental and physical pain to stop and so God saved me from my suicide attempt. So I wonder to myself is this what God saved me for? To live my life in a miserable state and go forward down a different path and no turning back? So of course my human desire is to NOT live such a miserable existence. And trust me there are so many times I really wish God would just take me to heaven. But I know my kids and family would be so hurt and really miss me.
So I guess this path that I am supposed to walk down is way different than the path I would have chosen for myself. I struggle and fight myself constantly and I truly hate this point in my life as it is.
So why as human's do we hate our current state of life if this is truly what God chose for us? Because just that, we are human and that is what we do, fight the current path that we are supposed to walk down. So I guess their are no wrong turns, just a path we didn't know we were supposed to walk down.
Do you have any regrets? Then if so don't look back and take the wrong turn, try to take a path we didn't know we were supposed to follow. Because maybe, just maybe, this path just may be the right turn.
Keep Smiling
Carla
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