New Year....

2016 Reflection to a new dawn of 2017...

As I sit and reflect on this past year, I have come to learn that life can give you the ups and downs, the ins and outs, the squeezes of lemons to lemonade, to love and to giving up, to learning to crying and so forth. I know all of us can completely relate to these different and many more reflections. Everyone has personal issues and life statuses as to how we look at the outgoing 2016 and the incoming 2017.

Most people make new years resolutions, most of which are never achieved. Oh we all try to make them work out, we go to the gym more, we try to eat better, for me I try to eat less, try to just do whatever it means to make our own lives in this big world a better place.

I am not like everyone else, I don't make any new years resolutions simply because I most likely won't promise to do any of them, and my list would be short. I would just love to wake up some day and be healthier. Wouldn't that be what most of us want? Healthy? For myself and many other chronically ill people we wish for so many resolutions to come true. I look at these things as an unreachable feat. That doesn't mean I give up. Nope, never give up, just keep fighting.

What is your biggest resolution or do you even make one like me?

If you believe in God or the divine power I do think God looks to each of us to take our new years resolution and apply it to our daily lives in small doses. We can't just dive in and give it our all because by a month of so we throw the towel in. So small doses. Kind of like baby steps. Think of one good resolution that has meaning to it and go forth. Don't try to make yourself push for your own dreams and hopes and not spread these wishes to others in need. Why? Because we need to make this a better world to live in. Oh I know, I sound like some kind of Woodstock lover of all the world and wish to make peace in the world. Well wouldn't that be nice, World Peace.

We will be facing a new 2017 in so many ways. Some could be good and of course some could be not so good. I like to sit back and drink a hot tea and reflect on my past and what was good and what has been bad. And of course the bad things seem so large. I know however that God has carried myself thru these rough times or I wouldn't be sitting her reflecting at this moment. My 2015 was hard on me since I lost so many people in my life that meant so much to me and I attempted suicide and then 2016 has brought so many rough patches and each 4th Friday I lay on a cold slab in the OR and have my tube changed out. These are not times that I relish, but I keep doing so for everyone who loves me, not for myself, but for them. If I had one wish, I'd pull it out and just let God sustain me. But...

I know my problems seem little compared to so many others and but they all are big to ourselves. Everyone of us have problems. Some people like to harp about them and can never see the glass half full. Mine hasn't been half full for a while. I just keep holding it up waiting to get it filled up with a margarita.

My 2016 brought me many good things, one of my babies got married, my other 2 babies have great significant others in their lives and this warms my heart. Gives me hope, hope in life that God is being the one who is carrying them thru even my darkest days. So that is why I don't attempt suicide again. I want to see much more. Like the sunsets and sunrises on a beach, sand in my toes and a margarita in my hand, not much for dreams. And then when I gain my Angel Wings I just want to soar over all of the earth and see the good in each and everyone, because there is no one dictator there is just people, people whom have hopes and dreams.

So don't stop dreaming and reaching for your hopes in 2017.

Keep Smiling
Carla