I can remember my mother telling me that life, spouses, children and just about anything we are going to experience here on earth does not come with a "instruction manual"... And gosh was she so right...
I do think tho that life is never a failure its just a point where we are practicing to either get better, do better, think better or just plain life.
I don't know about you but these thoughts really make me sit back and think about my own life.
I really wish my kids had came with an instruction manual, but I feel as tho I did a pretty amazing job of raising the most awesome kids. Or so I am a little biased. No one is perfect and if not for some failure's along the way the end result may not have been such a good outcome.
I think we all have to learn to deal with the guilt we carry.... GUILT is NOT our fault, it's all practice.
I know I harbor so much guilt, I feel as if I could have been a better wife, a better mother, a better employee, better at taking care of myself, but you know this life is all just a practice mode. A practice to strive to get it all right so when we do hit a failure we will stop and realize it was just that "practice" and this practice will help teach us to do better and hopefully not fail.
Failure is just simply a part of life. That is why each and everyone of us on this earth is different, difficult, loving and failures. Because God created us to be failures or we would be just that "GOD" and no one is GOD. (Even tho some people seem to think they are)...
I like to think that all of my failures have been a practice mode for me to move on with my life and strive harder to be all that I can be. No matter what kind of illness has strapped my physical body with. I may have Gastroparesis, COPD, Fibromyalgia, menopausal, a broken back and neck but you know what I am ALIVE.... It's that praise enough???
So I guess my Mom & Dad didn't get an instruction manual when they raised my brother, sister and I. Was it hard for them?? "Hell yes" is it hard for anyone "Hell Yes"...but you know when you children stare back at you once they are grown and the love in their eyes and the tears in their eyes knowing that we (parents) are human and our lives are short here on earth gives us all a sense of gratitude. (Or at least I know I have felt this great sense of accomplishment, and gratitude from my kids)... My kids may not be doctors, lawyers, but they are happy and they are thriving and they are carving out their nitch in this world.
Just because we are old does not mean we have to stop "carving out our nitch" in this world. Nothing is ever perfect, in fact we all face failures. I know I have faced so many different failures that I have come to realize that well life is just that "life"....
So I guess I have decided every since I choose to attempt to take my life that I was going to make major changes and that I have done. I am not going to let anyone stop me. Maybe I can't do the things that I wished I could do, or things that I did when I was young, but you know there is a lot of life left inside of me. I just need to unleash it. So I go to Planet Fitness daily and work out to help my body feel better, I sing to help my voice and heart feel better, I attend church to help me feel closer to God, I read to open up my mind to life that is out there.... I drive simply to show stoooopid people how to drive. I am a great mother, a great wife, a great employee, a great lover of GOD, and so on. Because if you can't believe in yourself then who will?
Now go out there today without the "instruction manual" and remember failure is just that failure, but it is a way towards practice.
Keep Smiling
Carla
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